Poofing In Paradise

I really miss playing Michele games!

2009-02-17T21:50:00.000-08:00

Okay, I admit that I'm not on the computer as much as I used to be, which means I don't blog as often as I used to or visit other peoples blogs that much either...but I must admit that when I do get online the first thing I miss is Michele Agnew...

I do not personally know Michele, but I feel like I do. I discovered her site a few years ago. It was awesome. She would write stories, ask questions, pose puzzles, conduct interactive contests. Every week there was something new, different and exciting. Anyone could participate. Also, every week there was the "Meet and Greet". You would say hello to Michele then go visit the person who posted before you, read the latest post, leave a comment and say, "Hello Michele sent me". I really loved playing the 12 (or 13) letter word game!! I rocked at it!!

Well, Michele retired from her blog. I understand that it took up a lot of her time and that she had to attend to her real life. (Go Michele!) So I am not mad at her, at all.

But someone else said they would take over...and they did take over the "Michele Meet & Greet"...but that's all they did...

No more "what if..." questions. No more "list your five favorite movies". No more "six degrees" quizzes. No more games at all! So we are left with a meet and greet and absolutely no FUN at all!!!

I really miss playing Michele games!

"All right Mr. De Mille, I'm ready for my close-up"

2009-01-08T18:29:00.000-08:00

Drama...is definitely a part of my life. Even though I do not want drama in my life, my life seems to be all about drama. It started when I was very young. As a matter of fact when I was about 8 or 9 years old, my mother and her Catholic Daughter friends started calling me 'Sarah Heartburn'. It excited me and angered me all at the same time. I was thrilled that I was getting attention, but unsure of what the name meant. Then, one day, I heard the meaning behind the name. It was a word-play on the famous actress, Sarah Bernhardt. I was okay with that, since she was so famous and all. I acted up a storm! Every time I knew my mother's friends would be visiting, I would plan my next 'performance'! Until...I found out what Sarah Bernhardt was so famous for. Completely ridiculous, over-the-top, exaggerated and distorted dramatic acting. Here I was thinking that I was being complimented on my acting, when they were actually laughing at my over-acting. Hence the name, 'Sarah HEARTBURN'.

Now I am grown and have children of my own. The first time I called my daughterthe beloved nickname, 'Sarah Heartburn' she cried & whined. There wasn't any excitement, no thrill and she didn't even know what I meant! So unfortunately, I know what that means...it means I'm pretty much screwed. Not only is she over-acting, but she is acting like it is real life! So it will be just a matter of time before she is saying..."All right Mr. De Mille, I'm ready for my close-up"

One Wish

2009-01-03T00:37:00.000-08:00

Let's just imagine that dreams really do come true. And you have the opportunity to grant one single wish for the whole entire world, except for world peace... What would you wish for...and why?

No More Reindeer Games...just my games!

2009-01-03T00:24:00.000-08:00

Well, it's either late at night, or early in the morning depending on the way you look at it...and I am bored!!!

I just visited 'Netchick' (Michelle's replacement) and she had a meet & greet posted...which is cool...but...there weren't any GAMES!!!

That's one thing that I loved about visiting Michelle's site...the games...

So, how do we fix this? Do I start a game? I don't think anyone will visit me though...

Either way...I want to play, I Spy!!!! (any takers?)

I spy with my little eye...something slimey!

Cutting Back Sucks!

2008-12-02T23:54:00.000-08:00

I know that the economy really sucks right now. I also understand that companies are looking for ways to cut back and that sometimes that means laying off staff. I know cause I was laid off! I was also fortunate enough to get another job.

But do you know what really sucks? My favorite Blog site, "Ask Michelle", has decided to discontinue the interactive blog & games that they have been doing for quite some time. I will miss it

Tonite I actually submitted my farewell response to Michelle...it is sad but true...

Maybe I will start another blog called..."Ask Eileen"...

We'll see.

Historical Election

2008-11-04T23:06:00.000-08:00

This was a historical election no matter which side was victorious. If McCain had won, then it would have been the first time a woman was elected as a vice-president. Sorry, but DENIED!

On the other hand, Barrack Obama won, so it is the first time that an African-American has been elected president. Awesome!

Personally, I don't care about his race, but I do care about what he can do for me, my family & my country.

History Repeats Itself...History Repeats Itself...History Repeats Itself...

2008-10-30T22:18:00.000-07:00

When I was younger I never believed that, "History repeats itself". I mean, come on, like Columbus would ever discover America again, right? Now that I am older and have had children, I know that it is true but not necessarily in the factual sense.

I was a challenging teenager, to say the least. My parents didn't know half of what I was doing, thank goodness, but even at half the trouble, I was extremely hard to deal with. It took years to recover our relationship, which thankfully we did. The love between myself and my parents outlasted and out shined all of the difficulties we experienced when I was an awful teenager, thank goodness!

Now, let's fast-forward about 18 years. I am living in a far away state. I am married with a toddler and 2 teenage daughters in the house. I am going crazy trying to control the younger girl, who although is a 'step' is mine (some people don't understand that part, but she is/was mine). To my face I was Eileen, but to her friends I was her Mom. Anyway, she was doing the usual illegal teenage antics, which I did call her out on. I could deal with that. But when I had to go back to work full time, she was being irresponsible when it came to letting people in my home to take what they wanted, along with skipping school and other issues. After having numerous items stolen including my original wedding ring, then I was also told by her school that I would be jailed if she continued to skip and that the only way to assure her attendance was escorting her from class to class, I had reached my breaking point. So I called crying to my mom, "Please, I need help, I don't know what to do..." I gotta give Mom credit, she let me gush until I finally said, "I need help, what should I do?" In response, I heard a soft chuckle. Here I am devastated and Mom laughed! My response? "I know I was a horrible teenager, I'm sorry, but I turned out ok, right? Please help me! Seriously, I need help!" My Mother responded, "You can only do what I did. Keep repeating to yourself, "This too shall pass, I will outlast...I will outlast...I will outlast..."

Fast forward 8 years...I'm still in Florida our daughter, Mallorie gets married and moves 1200 miles away. She has 3 new step children who all have ADHD. they stayed with her for the whole summer along with my daughter, Ry for 1 month and of course her own girls, Christi & Cailin. Now, to her credit, she didn't call me asking for help, but one time, about a 3 weeks into the 2 1/2 month stay, when I called her one night around supper time...she told me she was sitting in her car in the driveway because she had to escape. She then told me everything that had been happening at her home with her stepkids, which with their issues was a lot.

You know what? I chuckled...just like my Mom had done to me years before! Then I remembered the conversation I had with my Mom and thought, "Holy crap, she was so right!" I asked my daughter if she truly loved her husband then gave her the best advise that I knew.

I said, "Just keep telling yourself, this to shall pass, I will outlast."

History Repeats Itself...

39 Days & Counting

2008-10-23T23:16:00.000-07:00

This week, Thursday, is my Friday. I just completed my 2nd 4 day work week and I'm tired.

One thing that stinks about a 4-day work week is getting up at 5:15 every morning. I am still trying to get used to that, and I am yawning by 3pm every day.

It took a lot of work, but I finally cleaned out the AP office. Now, there are only 5 files that require additional documentation to update.

The other thing that stinks is that on my 3 day weekend when I don't have to get up early, do you think I can sleep in?? HECK NO!!! If it isn't my old bladder saying, "Pee now!", then it's the darn dog (I love Lady!) wanting to go out. It sucks! On the off-chance that those scenarios do not occur and I can sleep in...I almost always have some shocking dream that startles me awake and I look at the clock...it's 5:15 (crap!)

I know I am stressing on my 90 day probation. I really, really love this job & I don't want to get canned, hence 39 days & counting. But on the up side, I honestly think I should be ok, cause yesterday, I was informed that I would be getting a company cell phone...

I think my position is secure, but I will not know for sure until December 2nd.
DANG!...38 days & counting...

Everything happens for a reason, right?

2008-09-25T21:02:00.000-07:00

Ok, it has been ages since I have posted. There is a reason, which is as follows...

All year long I had been working hard, until July 30th...

On the morning of July 30th, I unwillingly joined the ever growing population of hard-working individuals whom due to the sub-prime rate mortgage idiocy, had lost their jobs.

I was led into a conference room to face an unknown "corporate" HR person who tried to give me the required "separation package" information. I was so pissed off, that I almost couldn't breathe! I just wanted to leave. I cut her off and asked if I could go. Later that day, after my anger subsided, I felt sorry that I had reacted so strongly. She had given me a business card, so I called. She didn't answer, so I left an apology on her voicemail.

I was out of work...God I hate looking for a job!!!! I applied for unemployment, which is some money, but lets face it, it isn't enough...

I revamped my resume. I posted it on a couple of sites and started applying for jobs. The next week was a charm, because I started getting calls left & right!!! The 1st call was the best. I know because I followed it to a new job, which I absolutely love!!!!

If I hadn't lost my job at (***) when I did, then I wouldn't have updated my resume or posted it on
monster.com, which means that EIWF wouldn't have seen it or called me for an interview which would mean I definitely wouldn't be working at one of the best darn jobs I have ever had...

I honestly believe that everything happens for a reason, right?

RIGHT!!!!!

Courtney's Smile

2008-07-22T21:33:00.001-07:00

When I cleaned Ry's room I found another poem that she wrote for her sister, Courtney. Here it is:

Her Smile

She smiles,

I smile

back

Joy in my heart

pearly white teeth

A smile of

love staring

back and

forth

Eyes shine

with a smile

in her heart

Smiles repeat

like a mirror

game

Smiles leap

across the room

and back

her smile is

a message of love.

Author: Ryann Wallace Duff

She's Back!!!

2008-07-08T22:27:00.000-07:00

It's all good...She's back!!!

I missed RyRy alot. When we picked her up at the airport, I told her father that I give it 2 days before I threaten to ship her back to her sister in Texas, he agreed. We both lost, it was 3 days! Oh well...

When she saw her room , she said, "Well, it's not what I expected...IT'S BETTER!!"

So I guess she loved her room, which is a definite kudos!

My baby's growing up...

I miss RyRy alot!!

2008-06-26T23:15:00.000-07:00

My daughter has an awesome imagination & she is very brave!

She went to visit her sister in Texas this summer and is flying back from Houston, TX to Tampa, FL alone, on July 2nd! She is scared, but I keep on telling her that it is nothing big for her to fly back from Texas alone. Her sister will put her on the plane and I will pick her up at the gate, but, I know that she will still be on the plane alone. (I think I'm freaking out about it more than Ry)

I am completely remodeling her room... I am excited about it & I hope she loves it. It is very eclectic...she picked the color of the walls & that's all. I have created a room that I love & I hope she loves it too.

I miss RyRy alot!!

A Very Special Person

2008-06-21T21:55:00.001-07:00

I was told that I needed to go out & have fun because my daughter was away visiting her sister in Texas for a month. So I made plans for my husband & I to go out with another couple. Within the first 5 minutes of us being out, I found out that a close friend of mine from the past, the woman who when my mom was 1400 miles away, adopted me when I was pregnant, and the first person to ever babysit my daughter, Grandma Jan had died. All of the sudden the air was sucked out of my lungs...I couldn't breathe. Then, I started sobbing. So I excused myself & escaped outside to cry. My husband came out to check on me, I said I was alright. I went back into the lounge and we all played pool, then went to another establishment to have some food. Through out the night I have been softly crying, every other moment my eyes were leaking; I couldn't help it, they wouldn't stop. My husband just hugged me and said he understood.

To my good friend, Jan you were a very special person in my life. I love you and I will miss you.

To my husband, Pete, I respect & appreciate you. You are my soulmate...

Because I Don't Want To!

2008-06-19T23:32:00.000-07:00

I miss my girl, RyRy. She's a good girl, very smart. She's 11 years old & she agreed to go to visit her sister in Texas for a month, if I completely remodeled her room. (Total Bribe!)

Room's almost done, and boy, is she going to be surprised!?!?!

I Blog Because I Want To

2008-06-04T23:08:00.000-07:00

I love the internet. I love to surf & I am extremely adept at finding information.

But now I must say... "Once apon a time; a long, long, long time ago, when I started blogging." I wrote for myself & never expected anyone to read or concur with my concepts. I loved being able to express my feelings, even though nobody else wanted to hear about it. That was ok with me!

I blog because I want to.

The Name Game

2008-05-22T23:10:00.000-07:00

Here is a question I would like to ask parents. How did you figure out what to name your child(ren)? Was it after a relative, friend, lost loved one, or was it a name that would sound good rolling off your tongue when you had to discipline your child? (Which one of my friends actually admitted to )

I see all kinds of names where I work. There are names from all walks of life. Some long, some foreign, some hard to figure out how to even try to pronounce them, and some extremely funny. For example, there was an actual person named, 'Ima Bush'. Seriously, Ms. Ima Bush. I am sure Ms. Bush is a very nice person, and I apologize if she is now reading this and is offended, as that certainly was not my main objective. I guess Ms. Bush's parents weren't thinking soundly after the delivery of their beautiful baby girl, "Let's name her Ima...Ima Bush." How much teasing & harassment do you think Ima received at school, in the playground or even at work? And unbelievably there are many, many, many and many more funny, crazy names out there! I actually saw a file for Jesus Crist. (I'm serious)

So now I would like to ask some parents, "What were you thinking?"

As a mother, I remember being pregnant, everything was crystal clear. I knew all of the tasks that needed to be accomplished, but then again I also craved steak, hot sauce & egg foo young (go figure). But most importantly, for forever, always & to this day, I love surprises. So, I didn't want to know the sex of our baby prior to birth. I did, however, decide on a name for our baby. The same name whether it was a boy or a girl. The first name had no family significance, but it was Irish, I had always loved it, & although I had rarely heard it as a female name, it could be spelled a little differently & still be cool. The middle name was my maiden name , because I am proud of my heritage & it is a Scottish tradition. And of course the last name was our family name, my married name, which I embrace because I love my husband and am equally proud of my Celtic heritage.

I know that some of you might have read my blog in the past few years. So some of you have seen my daughter's name. But for those of you that haven't, well, here's the kicker, as I now ask other parents, "What were you thinking?", I also have to ask myself the same question!! Because even though I thought I was being so smart; giving my child a cool name... I found out 4 years later that I was so wrong!!!

The first week my daughter was in pre-school, she came home extremely upset because another little girl called her, "Crying Ryann." Why didn't I see that coming? I should have known better. I had gotten teased almost my whole life for one thing or another, I wanted my child to have a different experience. But honestly, I think everyone gets picked on sometime or another, for all kinds of different things. I think it's wrong, but does happen.

I know that I love my daughter & her name. To me, her name means a strong & independent girl (future woman), unfortunately to other children it means she cries alot... The 'Name Game' aspect didn't even occur to me when I was thinking of children's names!!! It should have since my Dad's name was 'Chuck', which was always a favorite for anyone who wanted to play 'The Name Game', a tradition anyone from the 70's-80's era should remember. You know? 'Chuck, Chuck..."

So, now I know am am one of those parents that should be asked, "What were you thinking?"

Closed Door Meetings

2008-05-20T22:51:00.000-07:00

I work in the accounting department of a title company. Over the last year and a half, the mortgage industry has taken a huge tumble largely due to the sub-prime lending market crashing. Luckily over 2 years ago, my company was bought by a large nationwide company, which I think is the only reason we are still in business.

But still there were layoffs. Which I have survived.

At work today, there were a bunch of meetings, teams consolidating, teams dissolving, and then came the 'Closed Door Meetings'(Layoff meetings)...I can only hope for the best.

I love where I work & it took a long time for me to find this job! So what the heck!!! I hate closed door meetings!!!

The reply to: "A Letter To Mr Crist"

2008-05-13T21:01:00.000-07:00

"Dear Ms. Duff:

Governor Crist received your e-mail and asked me to respond on his behalf.

The Governor appreciates the challenges local governments face in providing essential services while also lowering property taxes. Governor Crist believes that local governments can and will tighten their belts while at the same time providing the services our citizens need and expect.

Thank you for writing and do not hesitate to write again on matters of concern or interest to you.

Sincerely,

Rex T. Newman
Citizen Services"

My response:

Dear Mr Newman,

I thank you for the response, but I still don't appreciate or understand the reasoning for the passing of the amendment.

Prices on everything are skyrocketing... except our pay...that stays the same...and has for years.

WTF?????

Hello, Mr Crist?? Got any answers for that??

2008-05-09T00:20:00.000-07:00

When I was young, people that were different, scared me and that's the truth.

Though it shouldn't have been that way, it's a fact. I have a cousin who is about 8 years older than me with Downs Syndrome. When I was 4 years old, at my Grandparents 50th anniversary party, she scared the heck out of me. For no reason what-so-ever, I was scared of her. She didn't DO anything to me. I was just scared. She was different. Back in those times (OK, I'm talking about the late 60's early 70's, NOT the pre-historic times), people with Downs were not asually in the mainstream population. My Aunt Joyce, my cousin Barb's mom, was told when Barb was born, that she should send her to an institution, because Barbara would never be able to walk, talk or function. Well, thank God my Aunt Joyce didn't listen. She worked relentlessly with Barb, and because of that, Barb learned to walk, talk & be productive, all of the things that the doctors said would happen, NEVER HAPPEN!!!

My cousin became semi-independent. She works, and has worked for years; she is a productive member of our society. Today she lives in what would be classified as assisted living. Not bad for for a baby that supposedly would have never walked or functioned & should have been either aborted or sent to an institution at birth...Anyway, I watched a documentary tonight on HBO about a married couple who have been deaf since birth & then decided that at age 65, they should have cochlear implant surgery. Afterward they could hear some sound, but not the same way we do, at least not all of the time. They could hear talking, but were not able to decipher the words. Some sounds were deafening while others were minuscule. Watching that program mesmerized me!

There is a good reason for that... I work with a deaf guy and he has a cochlear implant. I always thought that he could hear a lot, at least more than he let on to. After watching the HBO program, I wonder, "How much does he really hear?" I know everyone is different & there was a lot of screeching involved, and, I also know, he hears just 'noise'. So let's bring it on!!! What do you hear/sense? Our voices, our tone of voice, the revving of the engine...

Truthfully, there is no 'Can You Hear Me Now?'

A Letter To Mr Crist

2008-05-01T23:54:00.000-07:00

Dear Mr Crist,

I did not vote for Amendment 1 but since it has passed, I now have to deal with the circumstances.

Please excuse my lack of enthusiasm over the grand celebration of my property tax being reduced by approximately $61.00 a year, because my home is not in the 300k + value range that will actually benefit from the property tax break.

My husband is a county employee. He works for the parks department which is the first place the county has earmarked for lay offs. This year there were no pay raises. (Prices on everything have skyrocketed, but no pay increase) Now because of amendment 1 passing, he is in jeopardy of losing his job. Which would mean that we would lose OUR HOME!!! Do you know that there are no less than 3 houses on my street in foreclosure? And this is before your precious amendment 1!

In the last several months, due to the threat of Amendment 1, I have seen many of my government employed friends lose their jobs, and then their homes. How is this a benefit?

I have a child in the school system. The Pinellas county Superintendent has proposed cutting teacher salaries by 2% as well as closing schools. We will lose assistant principals, counselors and many necessary programs including those that help troubled students (the ones that REALLY need help). How is this beneficial to our future? Think about it, who is going to be 'in charge' when you get old? When we all get old. Why are you messing with the educational programs? And don't you dare say you aren't, because that is exactly what has happened due to your precious Amendment 1 passing.

I ask you to please, do us all a favor and be a governor for ALL of the people in Florida, and not just the privileged!

Today in the St Pete Times Metro section there was a headline, "Tight Budget? Not For Everyone", which told about you approving $2.5 million in the state budget for CW Bill Young Institute of Government for a St Pete College to also be led by US Rep Bill Young. It is going to be fully funded by the legislator. WHY??? I don't want my taxes, which I pay faithfully every year, going to that.

How many children in Florida do you think will go to that college now that the money that funds to our public school system is cut to the bare minimum due to the passing of amendment 1?

OMG!! People are losing their jobs left & right. We are losing public services left & right...HELLO?!?!?

CAN ANYBODY HERE ME?????

Christians-R-Us

2008-04-24T21:08:00.000-07:00

First of all, I want to say that I am going to write about something that occurred at work today.

Second of all, I truly believe that religion & politics should never be the topic of discussion at the workplace, unless, of course it is about a politician who screws half of the high-priced hookers in DC & gets caught or the discussion is about some *ssh*le church pastor who gets his rocks off by molesting innocent children.

Third of all, I know that the co-worker with whom I had the discussion knows about my blog & will probably read it, but I still feel the need to express my feelings on the subject. I know that he is a Christian and will respect my views.

So, here is what happened:

I went into the break room to heat up my lunch. One of my co-workers was studying for a bible class. I asked if he was working toward a degree or if the class was for is own personal knowledge. He answered knowledge. The class was on the book of 'Revelations'. I have always been intrigued by the book of Revelations and the many different interpretations of it. As a matter of fact, that is not the only part of the bible that has intrigued me.

I told him that I thought it was an interesting book, and how various religions interpreted the passages differently. Talk about a mistake. I broke one of my own rules, "Never discuss religion in the workplace". However, it was not my intention to piss my co-worker off, only to discuss. But he got a little huffy, then asked more questions, to which I honestly replied... so it went...back n forth...back n forth... Then he said one of the worst things you could say to me, which was, "That makes me question your Christianity". Hello!!! What??? Are you serious?

I grew up in a VERY Catholic family. All 3 of my mom's brother's were priests. For 12 years I went to Catholic school. My mother was 'Mrs Catholic Daughter of America' for crying out loud! In other words, I was force-fed Catholicism from the day I was born. I was taught that the Bible was written by man but 'inspired' by God.

So, being the sceptical person that I am & also having been screwed by men, I have questioned that part. "Written by man"; "Inspired by God"; "Written by man"; "Inspired by God"; "Written by man"; "Inspired by God"...written by man...

Let's see, how many 'men', in this world, who have been 'called by God' have also been inspired to molest children??? Hhhmmmm...can we count them on one hand? How about two hands? No?? Let's face it, there are too many to count. So that is one reason I question the Bible.

Also according to the Bible, homosexuality is forbidden...it is a sin. So I ask, does that mean that anyone who is gay is evil & will not be allowed in 'Heaven'? The responses I have received were not favorable. So again I ask, what happened to, 'We are all God's children'? Isn't that in the Bible too??

When I was younger, religion was forced on me to the point that I rebelled. I did not want to go to church. I was a Christian, but not necessarily Catholic. Then my family experienced a tragedy, my Dad got cancer...and died. There it is! Lights out...the worst day of my life, because I completely lost my faith. How could that happen??? Why??? He was a great person who deserved to live!!! After the funeral, heartbroken, I hardened, clearly there was no God, He didn't exist, there was no after-life, when you died, you were gone...the end. Then really came my nightmare, I went on a 2 year rampage of self-destruction. It ended thru a professional tragedy that turned into a saving grace...I got laid-off, I moved to Florida & I slowly rebuilt my life.

It took me YEARS to regain my faith and believe in God again. It has been a struggle each and every day. I have built a new life for myself. I have married my soul-mate, had the daughter I never thought I would, sadly lost another daughter(RIP), gained a son, a daughter & 2 grand children and unfortunately lost my Mom(RIP).

The funny thing about writing this is that even though I wrote quite a bit about events in my life regarding religion, I haven't even touched the surface of most of the issues that haunt me to this day. Maybe I will, someday...

Inside I do not feel I should have to say this but, I think that other people might need to see it, so here I go, "I do believe in God. I believe that Jesus Christ is our Savior. I also believe that we are ALL His children & are ALL welcomed into the Kingdom of Heaven" (Unless of course, we choose otherwise)

sign the blue paper

2008-04-18T23:55:00.001-07:00

When I got home today, my 10 year old daughter, who is in 5th grade, pointed to a blue paper on the kitchen counter & asked me to sign it. I said, "Sure, I'll sign it later", then continued unwinding from a tiresome week of work.

Well, it has been many hours later & I have finally read the blue paper. It is a notice from her school that states my child will be studying the subject of human growth and development. Then it lists several elements of the course such as body changes during puberty, reproduction, pregnancy & the birth process. In other words, my daughter will be taking 'sex education', for 3 hours a day, for 2 days.

I must say, this threw me for a loop. I have always been open & honest with my girl about these things. I know that I have talked to her about almost everything in that respect. Still, I expected the sex education classes to start in middle school not elementary school!!

After closely examining the blue paper, I have determined that there isn't a designated signature area, only a place to insert my daughter's name & my name. So I guess that means that she will attend sex-ed whether I approve or not.

Now I know why Ryann was trying to get me to sign the blue paper without looking at it!!

It's My Party & I'll Cry If I want To

2008-04-16T22:56:00.000-07:00

Wooo, hoooo!!! It's my birthday!!!

Today is my birthday. I am so excited. I always make a big to-do about it because it is the only day out of the whole year that is mine! Usually, I do what I want; I get what I want and I feel special.

Unfortunately, I have to go to work today, so there goes the 'all about me' plan...

Tonight I will go out to dinner with my family. It will be fun...but for now...I think I'll cry...

My Day, then Hers

2008-04-08T21:08:00.000-07:00

My favorite day of the year is April 17th. That's my birthday. It is a very special day. I think it should be a holiday, which sometimes it is in Massachusetts. (Patriot's Day)

There is a reason that I always make a very big deal about my birthday. I love being treated like it's "all about me".

Mom's birthday was April 18th, the day after mine.

What Are Teachers Supposed To Teach?

2008-03-27T22:08:00.000-07:00

If you have read my blogs in the past then you will remember the tirades I have had regarding the property tax issue in Florida.

Well, the f'ing amendment passed. Governor Charlie Crist, who by the way, does NOT own a house in Florida, called it a victory. I ask, "For Whom"? Not him obviously, as HE DOESN'T PAY PROPERTY TAX!!!

But the good news is my property tax will be reduced by approximately $66.00 a year. The bad news is my husband is a county parks worker who was just informed that their workforce will be reduced by more than 33% by September & if he still has a job then his job will be part of a roaming crew. In other words, he will be required to travel to any park within the county on any given day whenever 'they' say so. ('They' being the suits that have no fear of having to roam away from their comfortable offices in Clearwater.) It sucks, some of the parks are over an hour away from the park where he currently works.

Okay, the amendment passed & we have to live with whatever happens. I can accept that. What I do not have to accept is what happened at my daughter's school today.

There was an article in today's St Pete Times about county park workers losing jobs due to the tax cuts. So when I got home, my daughter, who is in 5th grade, said she had to talk to me and she pulled out the article in the paper, which she highlighted. "Look", she said. "This is about Daddy's job, he's going to lose his job". I asked where she got the article and she replied, "From my teacher. He gave it to me because I told him that my Daddy worked for the county parks department". Then she refolded it & put it back in her backpack.

I am pissed off at her teacher. He shouldn't have given her that article. My husband & I are well aware of what may be in store for him because of this amendment passing. We have been for months. We should be the ones to explain the situation to our daughter, not her teacher! AND, it wasn't necessary to do explain at this time!!!

Why would he think it is okay to upset & worry a 10 year old?

NOTE: I asked Pete if Ry had showed him the article the teacher gave her & explained why. He said no, but that explained why when he picked up Ry today she asked if he still had a job!!!!!

AGAIN W-T-F??? (That phrase comes up ALOT)

Teach what you are paid to teach!!! Leave the other stuff to the parents!!!

Count Your Blessings

2008-03-19T20:00:00.000-07:00

I freak out almost every day because I could not live up to my Mom's expectations. Her last request to me was to keep the "family" together. I took that seriously but it did not happen. To me, family is everything, blood is thicker than water. I tried, but unfortunately, my family does not feel the same way.

I moved to Florida 15 years ago with my dog Micki (RIP). I only knew 1 person. Everything happens for a reason.

I ALWAYS count my blessings!

I Hope You Dance

2008-02-28T22:42:00.000-08:00

Lee Ann Womack really said it all in her song, "I Hope You Dance". When I listen to that song, I have mixed emotions. First, I wished I'd danced. Second, I really wish I'd learned to dance.(joking, of course)

Seriously, the song delivers a great message about not sitting back & missing out on the great things that life has to offer. That is a lesson well learned...

So let's just dance...

Our Anniversary

2008-02-15T22:50:00.000-08:00

The first time around, I had a big wedding in a church, with a big reception following. That didn't last. I always said, I would never marry again until, I moved 1424 miles away from home and met Pete. He was annoying. Always in my face & never left me alone. No matter where I was when I looked around, there was Pete!! (go away!)

Over a period of several months, everytime I went out, Pete was there bothering me. One Friday night, I finally agreed to meet Pete the next evening which was Saturday, if he would go away. Pete agreed and I thought I was in the clear. Then on Saturday...I was bored and decided to go after all, even though I was more than an hour late, he was anxiously waiting for me! We have been together ever since! How hot is that??

The first week I really new Pete, he told my BFF that he was going to marry me! I completely rebelled. No F'ing way was I going to get married again! Well...

We got married on my parents anniversary, which was February 16th. I figured that date worked well for them...so it should really shine for us. And it has!

I love you Babe, Happy Anniversary!!

"Beads...give me Beads!!!!"

2008-02-06T00:08:00.000-08:00

Well, here it is, a day or so after the big game and the Patriots lost the Super Bowl...oh, CRAP!!! I heard all kinds of crap at work, but I will always take it with a grain of salt.

Then, all of a sudden, it's Mardi Gras, YEAH!!! Wooo!! Hooo!! There's a parade and celebration. "Beads, give us beads" rings out from the crowd; I'm not talking 'bout New Orleans, but Dunedin. I brought my daughter & her friend to the parade, then we met up with my bff & her family. My strategy for getting beads was just holding my arm up.

We all had a great time...Yelling, "Beads...give me Beads!!!!"

all-time record

2008-02-02T22:52:00.000-08:00

Well, it's finally here, Game Day!

The Patriots are going to play against the Giants in the Super Bowl! Our main objective is to win the Super Bowl. If they fail, then at risk would be the all-time record.

If the Patriots win, then they become the best team ever!

If the Patriots lose? Sorry...but not an option!

One Game Away!!

2008-01-24T21:22:00.000-08:00

I grew up in Newtonville, Massachusetts. I am the youngest of five, attended Catholic school, and learned from my Dad the art of snoozing in front of the TV on a Saturday afternoon watching the Red Sox. To this day, watching baseball on TV knocks me out.

I am a strong person, my mother taught me that. I stand up for my beliefs and I cannot stand for any injustice.

Though I live in Florida now, the Patriots are and have always been my team. As with the Red Sox, I used to watch the Patriots with my Dad, but back then it was only for away games, as they never sold out the home games so they never were on TV. Talk about a sorry *ss team! Then when they finally made it to the Super Bowl, as a wild card team, they played Chicago. It was horrible! Even Refrigerator Perry scored a touchdown!! It was pitiful!

Now, the Patriots are rocking! We are one game away from football history. I proudly wear my Patriot's shirt & display patriot decals on my car. Every week I hear, "The Patriots suck!", "I hate the Patriots" or "They cheat". Before, when the Pats sucked, no one ever said anything. So I ask myself, "Where were these insulting people when, during the super bowl, Refrigerator Perry was running across the goal line?" Did they say the same thing about the Patriots then? NO, I don't think so!!! They were probably were laughing at the Patriots!!!

One game away!! One game!!

So, who's laughing now?????

This is life...It's either 'what the f...?' or 'Thank the Lord.!'

2008-01-18T22:31:00.000-08:00

This is my life. Everyday I thank God for the life I have, then say, "What the f...?"

I thank Him for my loving husband, then say, "What the f...?"

I praise Him for blessing me with intelligent, healthy & sensitive children, then say, "What the f...?"

I rejoice in my Grandchildren, then say, "What the f...?"

Everyday I revel in the knowledge that I will always cherish this moment, then say, "What the f...?"

So, Thank the Lord for what the f...!!!!!!

"Mom, why did you do that?"

2007-12-31T22:17:00.000-08:00

Well, it's 2008 Woo Hoo!

Earlier tonight, we went to a child friendly block party. Every year we go to the same block party and we have a blast. The kids run wild, and the adults have fun.

Well tonight, there were a lot less people there than usual, so my attention was fixated on my daughter (10yrs old) and her friends, who are starting to become 'boy crazy'. They were all chasing the boys around in the dark, as usual for New Year's Eve. There I am trying to monitor where each girl was located in comparison to every boy! What an outrageous task! I made quite a few busts, and I know that my mission was accomplished...because my daughter complained, "Mom, why did you do that?"

Awesome role models...NOT!!!

2007-12-28T22:23:00.000-08:00

My daughter is a tween. She watches the Disney channel & Nickelodeon . I have always believed that those are the channels that she can watch without restriction. The programing is tween friendly. Then I hear about nude pictures of Vanessa from "High School Musical" on the internet. After that, I hear that Jamie Lynn Spears, the star of "Zoey 101", at age 16, which is a show that my girl loves to watch, is pregnant. OKAY! Awesome role models...NOT!!!

It's scary now-a-days having a young daughter, whom I know that no matter how much I tell her to be good, careful & watch out for the "Big Bad Wolf", will exert her independence, which is one of the personality traits she inherited from me. I have to make sure that she is careful & watches her actions.

First it was nude photos of Vanessa, then it was Hannah Montana concert tickets at no less than $200 a pop, and now Jamie Lynn Spears, 'Zoey 101', is pregnant???

Welcome to the Magic Kingdom of W-T-F!

Holi-days are melancholy-days...

2007-12-22T21:31:00.000-08:00

At least that is what they should be called, and for a good reason. It is a time for love, peace & joy. A time to remember all of your loved ones; your family & friends. And I do remember...Courtney, for example. She would be 23 this year.

As a child, I remember waking up early on Christmas morning...seeing the tree with presents under it. I remember the excitement of ripping open the paper and getting the one doll or toy that I really wanted. Then the other present was always pajamas or some other clothing. There were usually 2 gifts each, most of the time, not including the stuffed animals, and the gifts were cherished!

This is the time of year that I miss my parents the most!

I love you & miss you Mom & Dad!

...and so this is Christmas...

2007-12-16T00:14:00.000-08:00

"...So this is Christmas, and what have you done, another year over, and a new one just begun... And so this is Christmas, I hope you have fun, the near and the dear ones, the old and the young.
A very merry Christmas, and a happy New Year. Let's hope it's a good one without any fear."

John Lennon was cool. He always openly professed his beliefs to the world and used his celebrity to help broadcast his messages of peace and love. Besides that, he was my favorite Beatle...

During the holidays, please remember to be kind, patient & courteous.

His message was LOVE!

Let It Snow!

2007-12-13T23:52:00.000-08:00

"The competition is on!"; that should be the motto where I work. We are competitive when it comes to obtaining clients, and even more competitive when it comes to internal contests.

Now, this year my department "Rocked" the Halloween decorating contest, we ruled (No-one else even came close), so I figured, we proved our point, we never have to compete again. But no!! 'Tis the season', which means, of course, that there is a contest at work, the "Best Holiday Decoration Contest". I work in corporate accounting. My department is full of analitical people. We think. We have ideas. We obsess. We are perfectionists. So, obviously, as always, we will overcome (when will they learn?)

"WWWHHHHHAATTTT?"

2007-12-07T00:04:00.000-08:00

A typical answer to an ordinary question on any given day..."WWWHHHAAATTT?", "WWWHHHYYY?" or...silence...

She is 10. She hears what she wants to & ignores everything else. She says she is a tween. She watches the Disney channel & is influenced by some of their programs, I am not.

If she is on the phone with a friend, & I interrupt to tell her to do something else, she whines, "OOOKKKAAAYYY".

I can't stand the attitude, I don't want the tween, but I love the daughter, to death.

God Bless Jan

2007-11-29T22:38:00.000-08:00

On 11/29/00, my remarkable mother passed away. I was there by her side, with both of my sisters, one of our brothers & our sister-in-law.

There are so many reasons why my Mom was remarkable and I want to share a few with you. Not only did Mom work full-time, but she also managed to dedicate a great deal of her time assisting, organizing & planning events for Girl Scouts & Catholic Daughters. She was very dedicated to service. She was very involved in numerous church activities. She was liked & respected by a wide spectrum of individuals.

For me, the best thing about my mom was that she was always there. I might not like what she had to say all of the time, but she was dependable, my go-to person, loving & supportive. She wasn't a "saint", trust me, we were so much alike it was scary; but she was without a doubt an awesome person. (I still miss her so, sob...)

God Bless Jan

Procrastinator...Sometimes!

2007-11-22T00:24:00.000-08:00

I am an organizer, a planner, a go-getter; I like to be in charge. I thrive on a challenge. If I am told it is impossible; I embrace the opportunity to find a way to make it happen. That is the synopsis of the way I handle my work life on a daily basis.

So, why oh why would I choose something different now? Well, truth be told, it is always easier to put off to tomorrow what you do not want to do today! I am definitely down with it!

Hello, my name is Flleenie and I'm a Procrastinator...Sometimes!

Time Marches On

2007-11-17T23:25:00.000-08:00

"Time marches on"...as the saying goes...although only a saying, it is true. Time is the one thing that we can not control in our lives. Yet time is so important.

I have to be "on time" when I go to work. I have to be "on time" when I bring Ry to school. I have to be "on time" for everything no matter what. I have to be on time, no excuses! No matter who I am going to see or where I'm going to go!

Time is my best friend but it is also my worst enemy...

So to be on time, I need a schedule!

Shopaholic

2007-11-15T21:37:00.000-08:00

I have to admit, that for the last 7 years, I was one of those idiots that got up at 3:30am the day after Thanksgiving to go shopping. I thrived on the 'power shopping' & the 'money saving' aspects of the experience. I bought items just because they were on sale.

This year, I hit all of the pre-pre-holiday sales with specific gifts in mind. I am almost completely finished with my Christmas shopping...only 3 more people to go. But, I still can't wait to see the ads for the day after Thanksgiving. The 3 items I want will probably be on sale somewhere, & I will be up at 3:30am that day to go shopping!! okay..."Hello, my name is Flleenie and I'm a 'Day after Thanksgiving' Shopaholic"

Can I have a refund...please?

2007-11-09T00:47:00.000-08:00

Right now, it is way too cold, at least it is where I live, in west central Florida. OMG...bbbuuuhhhrrr...

We aren't even through hurricane season yet! Not that I am complaining, but hurricanes thrive on warm temperatures, right? Well, I think the season is over...cool, literally!!!

Now, may I please have a refund on my Homeowner's Insurance? HA, HA, HA...Good joke, huh?...(but honestly, can I have a refund...please?)

PATRIOTS RULE!!!

2007-11-06T21:37:00.000-08:00

The game against Indy last Sunday was hard for me to watch...The Patriots were down most of the game. They got a butt load of penalties, over 144 yards, I think. Every time I started watching, the Colts had done something good! Then late in the 4th quarter, the Patriots showed their true colors. They scored 14 unanswered points to win the game.

Go Pats!!! PATRIOTS RULE!!!

Time, is it on my side?

2007-11-02T21:58:00.000-07:00

When I was a child it seemed like it took forever to go through a year. Every year felt like a decade. Time dragged on & on. There was always time.

Now, as I get older, I know, there is never enough time. There have been too many happenings in my life to believe otherwise.

I mean, I feel like, I just bought Christmas gifts(for '06), yet they already have some ('07) black Friday ads online. And, actually, this evening I went to a Toys R Us sale with "Door buster" items, though I was disappointed as they were out of some of the items I wanted even though I got there 1hr & 10 minutes into the sale.

So, do I think time is on my side?

The Devil Made Me do It

2007-10-31T23:32:00.001-07:00

Today at work my department won the 'Halloween theme' contest. We rocked!!!

Usually, our department never participates in these things. We are corporate, a non-income earning department, that the company obviously feels can accurately function, keep the auditors happy, send out wires (payoffs), balance all of the MANY accounts, & handle every/all other banking/accounting issues... with only 4 Indians & 2 Chiefs...

When the email came out about the Halloween contest, one person in my department said, "I want to do it. Let's dress-up as something scary" So I answered, "Well, if we're going to do it, let's do it to win, and we did! Our theme was "Accounting Hell".

Everyone in my department went 'Balls to the wall'. I work at a title company in the corporate accounting department...funny thing...all of the other departments were amazed at our creativity & attention to detail. We weren't. We work in the ACCOUNTING DEPARTMENT ...ATTENTION TO DETAIL IS OUR MAIN CONCERN. When wiring funds, our hands hover over thousands & thousands of dollars...one wrong click & poof...money's gone!!

Anyhow, we won the contest. First time competing...and a win!! Then my 'Big' boss said, "Now I expect you to win every year."

I replied, "No, we already won. We don't have to prove anything. Haven't you ever heard of quitting while you're ahead?"

How could I get mad?

2007-10-19T23:21:00.000-07:00

I know I have posted before about my daughter's homework; which means I have to do HOMEWORK! I hate having to do 5th grade homework. I already went to school & graduated. My parents NEVER helped me with my homework. They never even asked about it, because when I was growing up, it was a well known fact, that every day you do your homework without questions.

The subject my girl always asks for help on is Math. Now I am a math geek. It was always my best subject & even now I work in an accounting department. Even though math is my subject, I have found that the powers that be have decided to change the names of different mathematical components and calculating methods, though the calculations remain the same. Sometimes, it becomes such a challenge!

I have a friend who went to college to become a teacher. We met when our daughters went to the same pre-school. Last Wednesday afternoon, my friend spent 2 hours tutoring my girl focussing on Math. The over-all evaluation said that my girl was proficient in math & had a good grasp of mathematical concepts. So...

I was pissed. I told 'my girl' that I knew she was not being honest & that I wanted the truth about her homework!!. She admitted to me that she was pretending to need help with her math homework because she wanted to spend more time with me (ouch!)!!

How cute is that? And, now, after knowing the truth, how could I get mad?

IT'S NOT MY JOB

2007-10-18T23:30:00.000-07:00

Creativity. That isn't a big word, but it has a big meaning. I have always thought of myself as creative, not crafty or artistic, but creative. This week was definitely an exception to my belief.

Every day at work we "huddle", which is a daily department gathering, that reinforces company policies, customer service and/or work ethics. The corporation sends out 'scripted' huddles every Thursday for the following week & we pick the one we want to lead. When I get my 'huddle', I start to 'Google' or 'Ask Jeeves' to get ideas on ways to spice up my meeting. I like to incorporate activities that are fun but will also reinforce the main subject. I always have found something, until this week.

Now the subjects of our huddles are repeated over and over & there are quite a few of them. This week my subject was about the do's & the don'ts of verbal & non-verbal communication. The no-no's of verbal for example, is saying, "It's not my department", "It's not my job"... the no-no's of body language, well, I think we all know what a huff, a puff & a storm away while stomping the feet means!!! I scoured & searched all over the net, but could not find anything that was interesting. Then I found this picture with the caption, "It's Not My Job"

Image courtesy Zilla the Younger

The picture is funny & great. The caption is right on the money. I think, how stupid is the person painting the white line on the road, move the damn branch, I would move the stupid branch. Everyone I work with thought the same thing. But in real life, people don't think that way. Most people would say, "It's not my job".

Where ever this picture came from, I guess they should be grateful that the white lines were painted on the roads at all, cause where I live, that branch would have caused the whole process to come to a screeching halt. The people painting would have to call their dispatcher, who would have to call the city, who would have to call the arborist department, who would have to go out there and move the tree limb... then, they would have to call back the people who paint the white line on the road...It would take a long time... AND IT'S NOT MY JOB

I am dramatic...

2007-10-13T23:14:00.000-07:00

I can not draw. I actually flunked coloring within the lines in Kindergarden. My sis rocks at art. She can sketch, draw, outline, sculpt or mold. She is a great artist.

I rock performing art. I can dead-pan, to the max; ask anyone. I can cry on a whim. I can be demure or bubble with enthusiasm.

I am dramatic...

Destiny is destiny, right?

2007-10-13T21:13:00.000-07:00

I know that things happen for a reason. I understand that... do I? Destiny is destiny, right? Pain & sorrow in this life is meant to be...right? What happens, happens, and what doesn't, doesn't...right?

In the middle of the night the phone rings...there's been a car accident...can't tell you the details...she's been bayflighted...come now. Everything happens for a reason. Yes, that's right!!

After the fog has lifted, there is a new beginning, a new day. A beautiful young girl with dark blonde hair and deep brown eyes. She will journey on a road that another has traveled before, walking with the same love & support as her big sister, Courtney. She embarks on a new adventure, she giggles as she skips along the sidewalk, she got the message, at least for now, thank the Lord....

Surfing The Net

2007-10-11T22:33:00.000-07:00

I enjoy surfing the internet. I love to search & receive all of the info I ask for, and then some! It is amazing the amount of information you can attain on-line. Boy I love surfing the net!

"Google" is my life-line! I can Google anything, and get an awesome response. For instance, my company is having a contest for the best team Halloween costume/theme. So I Googled, 'Group Halloween Costume Themes". I found some really funny & creative ideas! I absolutely loved two of the ideas. I'm not sure if we will use them, but if not, the ideas I found are definitely inspiring & will help us create our own ideas for Halloween. Boy, I love surfing the net!

Maybe I'll try ASK.com

Are You Smarter Than A Fifth Grader?

2007-10-04T22:54:00.000-07:00

I really like that show, 'Are you Smarter Than A Fifth Grader'. I think Jeff Foxworthy is funny. When the show first aired I thought, "My God, this game is easy", until I watched it the 3rd night. Contestants were dropping like flies. All of the questions are familiar because, I once was in 1st, 2nd, 3rd, 4th & 5th grade. Unfortunately, that doesn't mean I actually remember every single thing I learned back then.

Now, my daughter is in 5th grade. Helping her with homework, other than math, usually requires me to scour her school books or search for the information on the internet.

It pains me to reveal...I am not always smarter than a fifth grader.

no file number, no water...No Deal!!

2007-09-29T01:25:00.000-07:00

This week at work was pretty much crappy. In the morning everything was okay. Then for some reason, in the afternoon, all heck would break loose. There was always some cr*p going on... Like today, the airconditioner brokedown & there wasn't any water, only hot air was blowing through the vents. It had to have been well over 120 degrees on the 3rd floor. For 3 hours, there wasn't any running water in the building, which meant no sinks or toilets.

Take A Free Ride On the Reading Railroad!

2007-09-15T19:18:00.000-07:00

Ever feel like life is a game? Sometimes it's funny, then sometimes it's cruel. When I was younger I used to love playing games. Board games like Monopoly, LIFE, backgammon or chess, then Nintendo! I thrived on that stuff, I was addicted!

Lately, my life has been playing out like a game, very surreal but not fun. I feel like every move I make, I get trumped! I'm not referring to any particular aspect of my life, but my life in general.

I live to play and I play to live!!!

Lately, I haven't felt like playing...that sucks...

Ry's poem!

2007-09-14T23:01:00.000-07:00

The following is a poem my daughter (9 yrs old) wrote about her sister.

Courtney

I look

up at the

star struck sky.

I wonder

which

one you're on.

The brightest star

by the Big Dipper

or the smallest star

by the moon.

Watch me,

play games.

Somethings you

can't do forever.

But you can

always be my

sister.

And see me

in my dreams.

You smile.

You matter.

I miss you.

~Author~Ryann Wallace Duff~

She's Back!

2007-09-11T22:08:00.003-07:00

The 'puter is fixed and she's back. I know it, I just know it!! Thank you to the Big Guy!

I am so happy that you are back. I missed you..

Love you....

Now I Know 25 Is Not Ancient

2007-09-01T22:12:00.000-07:00

When I was 16 years old, I thought 25 was ancient. I thought I would be dead by the time I was 25. When my 25th birthday came around, I hid and stayed home in bed, it was my scariest birthday.

I was so surprised to live passed that day, that now every year I relish my birthday. I actually start talking about my birthday at least 30 days prior. In any random conversation, I will announce there are only so many days until my birthday. I'm not selfish or stuck up, I just think that everyone deserves to have their day & my day is April 17th! And I don't want to share my day, with anyone! (The president of the company I work for has the same birthday, but I don't care, I'm not budging!)

Now I am way over 25 years old but I don't feel ancient. Yes, there are some aches & pains, but even though that is my reality, mentally I think of myself as young. I guess the older I get, the younger every else becomes...

Update on the "Property tax" Idiocy

2007-08-30T22:46:00.000-07:00

FYI: I received my new property tax bill in the mail the other day.

If the proposed Florida property tax referandum, that is supposed to greatly decrease my property tax goes through...my property tax bill will decrease by $68.00 a year. Isn't that wonderful? $68.00 whole dollars!! WOO!! HOO!!

Even better, our sales tax will increase 2 cents on the dollar, which affects everyone. And we hope it will pay for all of the schools & public work projects. Then as a bonus thousands of government/state employees (maybe even my husband) lose their jobs! Which in turn will increase the unemployment & home foreclosure rate...Awesome!!

I love politics! (Dumb*ss motherf*ckers!!)

On Angel's wings

2007-08-26T00:45:00.000-07:00

A gentle wind blew across the land
reaching out to take a hand
for on the winds the angels came
calling out our daughter's name.

Left behind, are many tears
loving memories of the years
of joy and love, a life ne'er spent
and now to God our daughter's sent.

On angel's wings, a heavenly flight
the journey home towards the light
to us who weep, a life is gone
but in God's love, 'tis but the dawn...

We miss you, Courtney!!!

Think About It

2007-08-25T00:41:00.000-07:00

Question 1:
If you knew a woman who was pregnant, who had 8 kids already, three who were deaf, two who were blind, one mentally retarded, and she had syphilis, would you recommend that she have an abortion?

Question 2:
It is time to elect a new world leader, and only your vote counts. Here are the facts about the three candidates. Who would you vote for?

Candidate A: Associates with crooked politicians, and consults with astrologist. He's had two mistresses. He also chain smokes and drinks 8 to 10 martinis a day.

Candidate B: He was kicked out of office twice, sleeps until noon, used opium in college and drinks a quart of whiskey every evening.

Candidate C: He is a decorated war hero. He's a vegetarian, doesn't smoke, drinks an occasional beer and never cheated on his wife.

Which of these candidates would be your choice?

Candidate A is Franklin D. Roosevelt.
Candidate B is Winston Churchill.
Candidate C is Adolf Hitler.

And, by the way, on your answer to the abortion question:
If you said YES, you just killed Beethoven.

Pretty interesting isn't it? Makes a person think before judging someone.

Remember amateurs...built the ark. Professionals...built the Titanic

Mid-Life Crisis?

2007-08-24T20:44:00.000-07:00

Monday thru Friday...get up, get the kid up, make breakfast, drop the kid off at school, go to work, work, go home, cook dinner, clean up, go to bed. Get up, get the kid up, make breakfast... Robotic, same routine, different day.

This must be my mid-life crisis, has to be!! I feel like everyday is repeating itself, almost a carbon copy.

Saturday, try to sleep in, get woken up, avoid chores, embrace shopping & fun with friends...Sunday, try to sleep in, get woken up, avoid chores, embrace shopping... Robotic, same routine, different day.

Guess not!!

In My Neighborhood

2007-08-21T23:45:00.000-07:00

I love my home town. I moved here 14 years ago & will never move any where else!

We bought our house 7 years ago. It needed a lot of work, and still does, but we love our neighborhood. Our street is very quiet, not a dead end, but close to it. Usually the only people who drive down it, either live here or are visiting. My daughter is 10, she enjoys riding her bike. We live about 2 blocks from her elementary school, 1 block from the Catholic church and since the end of last week diagonally across from a convicted sexual predator, who by the way, was convicted of molesting a minor under the age of 12, although we don't know the sex of the victim.

I have always been told, that if they do the time...then all is fine...

He was not just a convicted sexual 'offender' but a convicted sexual 'predator'! (there is a difference) Public records show he was 22 when convicted of sexually assaulting a minor under the age of 12.

So much for our quiet neighborhood! And so much for my daughter out riding her bike or anything else, without supervision!

I already went to school

2007-08-16T21:47:00.000-07:00

Well, school this year begins next Tuesday, August 21st. We got a letter today because, this year, our daughter was selected for 'Safety Patrol'. This evening, I found out there was a mandatory meeting Monday morning @ 9am. Kind of irritated me, getting a letter from school on Thursday for a mandatory Monday morning meeting... Luckily, 2 weeks ago, I asked for Monday off, because it was the last day of summer vacation, & I wanted to spend it with Ry having fun.

My BFF has a daughter going to a private school, they started yesterday, & had some homework today. Her kid liked the school yesterday, but today we're not sure.

I don't want to do 5th grade homework! I don't want to do any homework! When I was in school, I did not get help with my homework, not at all!

Today, as parents, we are expected & required to assist with homework assignments for our children, not that I don't want to help. I just don't like being told I have to to the work. I mean how does my child learn if I do & suggest everything & she does not think, visualize or imagine other possibilities?

(sometimes it hurts...)

2007-08-11T22:20:00.000-07:00

I am always reflective, this time of year. Can't be helped. She was only 19. Her birthday was July 25th, her passing was August 25th, I am always thinking of her, and I am especially sad & sensitive this time of year.

You know what I think is f'ed up? I posted a blog on July 12th ("That thing on my window") Not 1 person commented or emailed me. I didn't expect much response, but I did at least expect some comments from my family members who visit my sites regularly. I know they all didn't get a chance to know Courtney very well, but she was my family & very much a part of my life. I am not begging for sympathy or empathy, & I never will, but still, it hurts a little that my family did not even take the time to acknowledge the post or even ask how we're doing.

I know this blog will probably piss off some people, but being my true self, I don't care, I'd rather be honest with my feelings than worry about getting flack from anyone.

I am who I am. Take it or leave it. Love me or hate me.

(sometimes it hurts...)

as my sis says

2007-08-11T18:32:00.000-07:00

Okay, here is something I don't like to admit, but it must be true as my sister & BFF constantly say it is so...I'm very particular & controlling about the way everything is done regarding every aspect of my life. In other words, I'm anal.
Personally, I don't see it that way, I just think I am meticulous when it comes to details. I have my own ideas on the way things should be accomplished & I want my projects done my way.
So, what's wrong with that? I guess it does sound obsessive...

Say "NO" to the "No Property Tax Referandum"

2007-08-10T22:50:00.000-07:00

VOTING IN FLORIDA: I think it sucks that the new property tax referendum is going to be enacted. I didn't vote for it. I don't think all of the homeowner's in Florida really read and understood the proposal before voting. Alot of residents only listened to & heard, "no property tax", especially the elderly, who encompass at least 60% of our voting population.

It actually isn't a "no property tax at all", but could be a less property tax for "some" people and definitely more sales tax for 'everyone'. It might save a couple of hundred dollars a year for some homeowners, but that is not guaranteed. We are going to lose alot of government sponsored programs. First & foremost is the public school programs that will be eliminated!!! There is already a list of schools in our county that will be closing. Funding for any extracurricular activities will be axed, and forget any other federally funded activities or services.

All I know is that a butt load of government programs are getting axed and people are losing their jobs. How is THAT beneficial to our community? Writing my local congressman, obviously doesn't help, since I already have & it didn't do any good! ***So I need assistance with this one.***

My husband is employed by the county, because of this b*ll sh*t, he may lose his job. If he loses his job, I lose my home, because we are & have to be a 2 income family. The community loses necessary services & thousands of residents lose their jobs. This is not priceless, this is real life, not a mastercard comercial!

it is my life

Rain, rain go away

2007-08-02T20:33:00.000-07:00

Rain, rain go away...come again another day...rain, rain go away, come again another day...

I know we are in a drought situation, but come on, it's Florida!!!

It's been non-stop for 2 days!!

HELLO? Is there anybody out there?

2007-07-27T21:21:00.001-07:00

WWWOOOO!!! HHHOOOOO!!!

Is there anybody out there? Just holler if you can hear me. Is there anyone home?? (Pink Floyd, The Wall)

Okay, I guess I should just continue to write for me, myself & I, but about what?

In My Bathroom

2007-07-26T23:39:00.000-07:00

Well, we finally did it. We had our bathroom remodeled. Completely gutted and revamped. No more 60's blue toilet & tub, no more yellow tile 4 foot high on every wall.

Everyone who really knows me, knows that I am not a decorator, but I figured since the bathroom hadn't been updated since 1960 & we were spending a butt load of money that I would make an effort. I went with bone fixtures, not white! In the shower/tub area there is a glossy tile with light beige & gray accents and on the floor a rough tile that is gray with some beige throughout. My toilet, tub and vanity counter top all match perfectly! I had to special order the vanity,which cost a lot, but the one I received was not the one I ordered! My vanity had to be 54" wide & only 18" deep. I wanted drawers on both sides and doors in the center. I was told "NO CAN DO" Only 1 drawer on each side and then the rest cabinets. But when I got home Friday evening & vanity was installed, I saw that the wood was WAY darker than 'honey oak', but there WERE DRAWERS ON BOTH SIDES!!! (exactly what I wanted to begin with even though, not what I ordered) I would have complained & returned the vanity, but the darker wood does work and I got my drawers! WOO HOO!!

The bathroom is usable but not finished (almost).

When it is complete, I will have to entertain people...in my bathroom!!!

You know what sucks?

2007-07-24T22:25:00.000-07:00

You know what sucks? My sis is the only one who takes the time to read my ramblings and right now her computer is on the outs...So my ramblings are JUST ramblings, without an audience... Okay, (inhale, exhale) WHATEVER!!!!

Our Fun Outing

2007-07-19T22:52:00.000-07:00

Well, the big bus trip outing to the baseball game was not that bad.

We went up an escalator instead of trudging up the big long-ass ramp. Drinks were expensive, but I could get an Absolute for almost the same price as draft bud.

The Devil Rays were winning until about the 5th inning. After we saw the Yankees go ahead with 2 home runs, we left. We went to a place called Ferg's which is across from the stadium. At that point, my buzz was gone, so I did 3 shots of Cuervo Gold chilled and ordered a Stoli & diet coke. ten minutes later I had another shot of Cuervo Gold; then I started dancing. Boy I had fun. After a few hours we got back on the bus and went back to the bar, then Pete & I left and went home.

Boy, I'm getting old, the next day I was so hung over that it took me all day to eat my breakfast! Which I finally finished at 5:00pm. Sh*t, I used to go to all day/night at outdoor concerts and be fine for 2 days! (remember Foghat, Molly Hatchet or Blue Oyster Cult?)Anyway, I made Shepard's pie and Pete said he had an awesome birthday!!

Kill-The-Keg, or my headache...

2007-07-13T23:41:00.000-07:00

Pete's birthday is this Sunday, July 15th. He won't tell me what he wants for a present, so, SURPRISE! I'm his present (and he WILL like me, whether he wants to or not!!!)

Tomorrow, we're going on a party bus trip to a baseball game with the crew from the pub where he hangs out. I really didn't want to go, but he kept asking me & asking me, so I finally broke down & agreed. It's a kill-the-keg trip. (Yuck, draft beer, hang-over city!) also we have to hike way the heck up to the top of he stadium (nose bleed seats) then pay $9 for draft beer, because we're thirsty from the long hike.

The Devil Rays are playing the Yankees & at least I can have fun razzing all of the Yankee fans!!! (especially Big Bad)

Pete just traded his boat for a motorcycle, sight unseen, been talking about it for 2 years. I told him he had to have better life insurance first, which of course, not. But not to worry, I heard the motorcycle was more of a piece of crap than his boat was...so no worries there for quite sometime!Gotta love them

That thing on my window

2007-07-12T22:51:00.000-07:00

Well, anyone who knows me, knows that our/pete's daughter, Courtney, passed away in a car accident in 2003. Well, our daughter, Mallorie, had decals made for our cars..."In loving memory of Courtney..." which I love! Last week, someone at work asked, "The red jeep is your car, right? The one with that thing on your window...

"The saddest thing is that, this is someone who has worked in my office with me since I started over 2 years ago. Now there are only 5 of us in my department, besides management Although I appreciate that no-one wants to gossip about my family, I am astonished. (NOT, I'm sure they talk when I'm not there). We talk about everyone else. Noone ever asks.

I remember about 2 months after I started working there, one girl went off about cremation, about how she thought it was so wrong and who would ever do such a thing...needless to say, she was young (twenties); we had Courtney cremated (Lord knows, when I pass I want to be cremated too!!) I bit my tongue & didn't say a word, which was very hard, 'cause I didn't want to be pegged as "the bitchy woman", which is how it would have come across, so I smiled & sucked it up. (cried inside a little).

Well, not now!!! F*CK that!! cremation, whatever, our souls all end up where they are supposed to. There is a greater purpose. Death comes to us all!

Other people know about that thing on my window, my real friends....and they remember & I remember & we always will...

remember when?

2007-07-03T01:02:00.000-07:00

I think it sucks that I have to admit to remembering this far back...but I remember when...

My allowance was a quarter and I would go to the corner store and get a weeks worth of candy for just 25 cents.
penny candy was a penny
a pack of smokes was 25 cents
at 6 years old, you could leave the house and didn't have to be home until dark.
we used to thumb everywhere and we were never worried about crazies & sickos.

Now I think it sucks that I have to know that...

it is common practice to give an allowance to a child for absolutely nothing; and it has to be a minimum of $3
penny candy - no such animal
smokes? over 4 bucks!!!
there is no leaving the house alone, well maybe when she is 10 I will let her out, with maximum supervision.
thumbing? What's thumbing...(that's my story & I'm sticking to it!!!)

older is better

2007-06-14T23:00:00.000-07:00

Getting old sucks, but it is better than the alternative.

I guess I am what most people would call "Middle Aged". Even though I think I am young, I'm not...

Over the last 7 years I managed to ignore or explain-away any and all ailments & medical issues that I have experienced. Well this year, I said, "this is the year I get healthy". I finally went to the doctor and let them take blood and do tests... It hasn't been fun, not at all. You know the saying, "Ignore it and it will go away?" Well, that doesn't work especially after you reach 40!! What a wake up call. (knock, knock, is anyone home? Luckily, I answered the call!)

(You're born, life sucks, then you die...) NOT!!! At least not me! Life is an awesome experience and I plan on living mine to the fullest.

HELLO WORLD, I AM EILEEN!!!!

High Speed Internet

2007-06-08T22:07:00.000-07:00

WWOOO HHHOOO! I finally have high-speed internet! Okay, most people would think that is a wierd celebration, but not me. over the last 10 years, I have been been working the dial-up; sure it sucks but enough is enpough

Worry Wart

2007-05-15T21:26:00.000-07:00

I worry. It's a well know fact about me. I worry about all kinds of stuff. I worry about making ends meet. I worry about what Lady-Lick-alot does when I'm not home. I worry that there won't be enough food at Thanksgiving dinner or our anual 4th of July barbeque. I worry that Ryann won't like her birthday presents. (which is silly, because she likes everything that's a present)

I also worry about significant things like...I worry about doing the "right thing". I worry about the war in Iraq and all of our troops over there.

Mostly, I worry about my family.

The last thing I worry about is me. Found out recently, that's not smart.

FYI: Always take care of yourself, because if anything happens to you, then who would take care of your family?

American Pride

2007-05-09T21:58:00.000-07:00

Tonight I watched the movie 'United 93" I cried through almost the whole thing. The movie re-enacted that fateful morning. The film not only focused on United flight 93, but on the personnel tracking all of the highjacked flights, etc...

I remember that morning watching on TV when the news was reporting that there was a fire in one of the World Trade center towers. I was watching when the second plane crash into the other tower. I cried when the tower collapsed. All I could think was about how many people just died. then the second tower! I had just recently lost my mom, but that was nothing compared to all of the lives that were lost and the lives that were forever changed...I cried then, I cry now and I pray...

What a senseless waste of God's greatest gift...life!

this is the way I am

2007-05-08T21:01:00.000-07:00

I am a very blunt, straight forward type of person. I don't take crap and I never have taken crap. If I were a man, I would be respected, but since I am a woman, I am considered a bitch. Fair??? NOT!!!

Growing up, my family constantly teased and made fun of each other. Every sibling's birthday, I always felt there was a competition to find the most insulting card (without being too cruel), and if you were the one to give that card then you won. Won what? I honestly don't know.

Anyone that knows my family, knows Wallace's are jokers. We kid around a lot. My dad was the best kidder of them all. He really knew how to joke around with everyone. No matter the age of the recipient, they always laughed. God bless Red!

Unfortunately, when my siblings and I joke with people, it does not end with the same result. (I guess we are probably lucky that we haven't been sued.) We are usually taken seriously and considered mean!!! Imagine that!!

I am so tired of having to explain myself...So here I go...Okay World, I'm joking...lighten-up...don't be so serious...it's funny...I'm sorry...

Having a baby, ouch!

2007-04-26T21:49:00.000-07:00

I just spoke with my niece, who is desperately awaiting the birth of her second child. She is nine months pregnant, and anyone of you who has ever been pregnant should understand what that means comfort wise; NOTHING IS COMFORTABLE!! No such animal! End of story!

She wants to have the baby so bad. To help induce labor, I told her to have sex, she said she did. I told her significant other to have sex with her again, and to give her spicy foods... he said, tell her that...which I did before she handed him the phone. Any who...

I remember my ninth month as if it were yesterday. 'Any which way you turn', is not a Clint Eastwood movie! It isn't fictional, it is reality and it really sucks when a baby is pressing up against your bladder and every other internal organ you have!! I mean WHOLLY CRAP!!! The little kicks or hiccups here and there are endearing, to a point.

Anyway, labor sucked the big one and when she popped out? There was no popping, there was tearing. Not tearing but, RIPPING! Wholly OUCH!!! And my kid was only 6lb 13oz! Predictions for the size of the new kid on the block? Well, he was estimated at over 5lb at 32 weeks (I think?) So I'm predicting about 8lb 12oz at birth, which I already told my niece. Unless she keeps him in the oven another week. Then the numbers would change; but knowing her, another week is not an option.

Welcome to the world nephew! Auntie loves you! (4/27 4:27; hopefully not until 5/7)

Out of the Loop

2007-04-24T21:56:00.000-07:00

Okay, I know I have been silent for quite a while, but I really didn't understand what that meant in blogger time. From what I have gathered, I have been away so long that I am no longer a "blog to note" or a "blog to visit". Yet my neice, who stated she only used blogger so she could comment on her cousins' blogs, is.

Okay, I started calling people instead of blogging...I guess that was a mistake. You can say more to a person in a call, but inform less people about your news. Anyway, I guess writing is the best way for me to communicate.

so...what do I say???

2007-04-18T20:30:00.000-07:00

Well, I'm Back... After a long absence, I finally have found my will to write again. But...it is so hard to pick just one subject to focus on since so much sh*t has been happening in the world these days. So maybe I'll just let my mind wander...

Okay...yesterday was my birthday. It is the only day of the year that I can do exactly what I want to do, only because I say so!!! It was okay. I mean it was a Tuesday and I had to work. Then Bill, Carol & I had king crab at my house, which was nice, but I wasn't supposed to help...Well, anyone who knows me at all, knows that watching them in my kitchen cooking & cleaning pretty much drove me up a wall . But, you would be proud of me; I didn't flip out, but I did have to rearrange the dishwasher this morning!!! (It was way too messy!) Like Carol always tells me...I'm anal; like Bill tells me...I'm bitchy.

So, I guess that leads me to a totally different subject; am I becoming my parents? My first reaction is, "Holy crap! I am!" But when I step back and take a breather, I realize, yes I am anal, (thank goodness) and yes, I am bitchy (I'm a woman going through the change; feel lucky that is all I am!!) I am also, caring, loving, trustworthy, brutally honest and one of the most faithful friends a friend could ever hope for...for any friend or loved one this applies.

Others beware...

Now Here Comes Rita!

2005-09-21T10:57:00.000-07:00

Last year was Florida's year for hurricanes. I guess this year it's the Gulf coast...

Hey, let's relocate the people who evacuated from New Orleans to Texas. Sounded like a good idea at the time.

Now here comes Rita. Threatening to hit the Texas coast and right near Houston, I might add.

Do you think the people who went to Texas from New Orleans feel like they are jinxed or what?

You know what? Sometimes life just sucks.

Life's Plan

2005-09-16T22:03:00.000-07:00

I know everybody has their own idea regarding what LIFE is all about. I know I do.

To quote Sally Fields in 'Forrest Gump', "Life is like a box of chocolates, you never know what you're gonna get." I beg to differ. Maybe on a conscious level we don't know, but I firmly believe that before we get here, we choose our life, our parents and our purpose for the life. Some of our souls come back time and time again... Some don't.

Ever heard of the Akashic records? (my spelling might be or probably is off) These are the records of life...of everything...It's pre-destined. I know and believe that everytime we come to this earth in life, we strive to learn lessons that will in turn elevate our souls closer to God. That is our goal after all. Isn't it? To be closer to God?

So do you think I'm crazy??? Or just nuts??? OR BELIEVABLE!!!

Family

2005-09-14T21:11:00.000-07:00

What is family??? Is it a brother?? A sister?? A cousin??

I think family is not only that but more. We all have brothers, sisters, step-daughters, step-mothers, sisters-in-law, sons-in law, friends...

In this world, there are many people that I know and like, acquaintances, co-workers and similar. But, family, to me is more.

I miss my original family, you know the one that was only about us, the original 7? The one I was born with? My Mom, Dad, brothers and sisters. I know Mom and Dad are gone...but my brothers and sisters are still here. I talk to my sisters on a consistent basis, not my brothers.

One of my brothers made it well known to me, he DOESN'T HAVE TO CALL. I actually got into a fight with him last year. There were a few major points to that fight. One was he never calls me. He replied, "I called you on your birthday". I had to point out that the last time he called me was on my 40th birthday which was a year and a half prior. I also asked him to do something for my sister that I couldn't do because I did not live closer. BIG FIGHT. Either way, it was difficult because we argued big time! I later wrote him a letter trying to explain my position. (**Please note** This is not a good idea when you are writing to an attorney) I wrote a letter, which unfortunately for me, he analyzed for 2 weeks before he called unexpectedly one Saturday afternoon. Needless to say as an attorney, he went off the deep end. To summarize: we have different opinions on what family means. Here is an example of a question I posed, "For instance, if some day after you and Jane have passed on, wouldn't you want your children to be there for each other???" He answered, "That's not the same thing." I stopped the battle. He's gone...finally I see...he's a MacCormack... (My mind soars...where is Jan? My head is screaming, "I knew the family would fall apart!")

My other brother only calls because I bitched him out last year after the hurricanes, told him, he was a sorry ass for not giving a shit about me and my family. After that he called for every hurricane, whether it was close to Florida or not. This year he's slacking. Oh well. But he is coming to visit. My sister thinks he's going to stay with her, but I have a big-screen and cable TV that says differently!! I have to add, I was amazed and dumbfounded that Don did not call at anytime around the hurricanes. I mean even my mother-in-law from England emailed!! What the F***??

Still don't have the 'old-time family' feeling. BUT I DO HAVE my husband, whom I love immensely, my children (yes, children) whom I love unconditionally, my grand children who think I know everything (God bless them & they're right!), my friends whom I love exceptionally and my sisters whom I love eternally.

My sisters treat me like I was gold!! God bless them!!

What do you think about family??

Prime Time

2005-09-09T22:01:00.000-07:00

Today, my daughter brought home a composition note book from school. She showed it to me and inside there was a note that said, "Your child has been selected to be the PRIME TIME student of the week." There also was a newspaper clipping from an Ann Landers column that said writing about a student in a book is a special way to appreciate them. Every week a student would be chosen and the parents and/or family must write something special or unique about their child in the book then return it to school and it will be passed on to the next winner's family.

The first thing I thought was, 'My child, the PRIME TIME student...Awesome!!' Then I thought, 'What should I write?'

There were two prior entries. I read them. The parents touted their children (as most would) as being the most kind, generous and thoughtful children alive. What parent wouldn't? Okay!! I started thinking about last year in school...2 girls taunted, teased and made fun of my daughter. At times, she would come home crying because of those bullies... (I had a conference with her teacher, the teacher said she thought the girls were jealous of my daughter because all of the boys liked her. We're talking 2nd grade, for crying out loud!)

I can honestly say, my daughter has a lot of great qualities, but also has many faults. How honest should I be? The other parents made their kids sound like they should be considered for sainthood. Come on now!! In reality we all know that is just not true! Kids can be so cruel!!

All I can say is, my daughter is the best person she can be. I've tried to teach her to treat others as she would want to be treated, and so far that seems to be working. She is imaginative and creative. She is the only girl I know that can take a cardboard box and make a game out of it that lasts a full day. For her, it is wonderful to be eight.

How does that compare to the other two 'saints'?

Now I know...IT'S EVEN BETTER!!!

Are you ready for some FOOTBALL???

2005-09-09T11:51:00.000-07:00

Thank god football is back. Now there's finally something worthwhile to do on Sundays again!! PARTY!!!!

GO PATRIOTS!!!!

They won last night, yahoo!!

Pool anyone??

2005-08-27T06:28:00.000-07:00

Well, we're having fun in the Florida sun. (Hard to believe she's already 8 years old!) Wish you could join us.

It's sad to think that I've been here 12 years and can count on 1 hand the number of times all of my family (excluding Mom) and friends have visited me.

Let's see, friends = none & family = 5.

Yet I've been back to visit...about 15 times....hmmm...

We have nice weather and sunshine... They have cold...snow...slush...sleet... (should I go on?)

Wouldn't you like to PLAY SOME POOL????

Courtney

2005-08-25T19:30:00.000-07:00

Well, I got through today and though it was painful, it was easier than last year, Thank God.

Well, I woke up this morning and got Ryann ready for school without any argument or fight, Thank God.

Well, I filled my day at work with answering phones, proofing wires, filing, verifying funds, etc...Thank God.

Today is a tough day.

Today is the anniversary of the day that my step-DAUGHTER, Courtney left the earth.

Courtney was killed two years ago, on August 25th, in a car accident, she was 19 years old. She was a victim of road rage, if you can believe it. (I know we can't.) She made the bad choice of getting into a car with a man who was angry and high. She also chose not to wear a seatbelt... Unfortunately, for her and us, IT WAS A FATAL DECISION.

With three other people in his car, this man decided to race down a rural route going 60 mph. He tried to run another car off the road, which he did accomplish. After which, the man lost control of his car and slammed into a tree going 60 mph.

Courtney was in the front passenger seat, she was not wearing a selt belt. The medics said she was dead at the scene.

What do you think was going through her mind? During the chase? Just before impact? I wonder about that. It's enough to drive me crazy!

When Courtney passed it was hard. At the time, we were treating her with 'tough love'. Not just Pete and I, but Mallorie, her sister, did as well.

I always thought there would be time. Shame on me, I should know better.

God knows, when I was young, I didn't get along with my mother, but when I grew older I had the chance and opportunity to realize that my mom wasn't such a bitch and that she actually knew what she was talking about, at times. I always thought I would have that with Courtney. You know, that one day she would 'wake up' and realize that I wasn't such a bitch. Never happened.

But, I hope that I'm not such a bitch. Mallorie, without knowing it, proves that to me every single time I speak to her. She told me not too long ago, although not in the same exact words, that because of me she has a relationship with her dad... That means a lot.

But, it still doesn't change the fact that Courtney is dead.

Life sucks...sometimes...

Finally Football

2005-08-19T21:57:00.000-07:00

Finally Football!!! I LOVE football!!! Now, I say this because football is the only (and I mean only) sport I watch faithfully.

Now, usually I only love PATRIOTS football, BUT... (did I already say I loved my new job?) This Saturday night, August 20th, Pete and I are going to the Buccaneer's game...We are sitting in a LUXURY BOX at Raymond James stadium. The owner of the company I'm working at (did I already say I loved my new job?) decided to give his LUXURY BOX tickets to our department. Now, I've been told by several different sources at work that 'this never happens', so I am officially calling myself the 'GOOD LUCK CHARM' of my department. (ha, ha)

It's funny, but sad, that I really don't give a rat's ass that the Bucs are playing, I just want to see what the luxury box is like!

Either way, each ticket goes for $250.00, so it's like a $500.00 bonus right off the bat!! Yee Haw!!

Golfing in paradise

2005-08-14T20:08:00.000-07:00

The one thing I love about my life is that there is always something new popping up.

Three weeks ago I found out they were having a golf tournament at my new job. Now, I have NEVER golfed before in my life and quite frankly I thought it sounded like the most frustrating sport in the world. I mean, what could be relaxing about hitting a little ball from here to a little, tiny hole way the hell over there?!?! And at home if I ever put on the golf channel it was because I wanted to take a nap and had trouble falling asleep. I mean really, think about it!

So being the 'new girl on the block' and hearing my department needed one more player for their team, I volunteered..............

Okay, a couple of things I need to point out. First, the company was raffling off a 42 inch plasma TV with a home theater system, plus an additional $5,000.00 in cash prizes. And the only way to win was to play in the golf tournament. Second, it was completely free and included 2 meals and all the beer you could drink. Third it was a best ball tournament. And last but not least, I found out the other members of my team were not golf pros...

So we played golf yesterday. We played at 1:30 in the afternoon in August in Florida!!! How stupid does that sound?? Do you have any idea how hot it was?? And believe it or not it didn't rain. (which we would have welcomed) Anyway, I was completely covered in sweat by the end of the first hole.

Come to find out it wasn't as bad as I originally thought it would be. I actually hit a couple of nice shots and sank a few putts. I had a few cold ones and some pretty decent BBQ after it was all said and done. And as for the TV and cash prizes.........

New Job

2005-07-31T07:29:00.000-07:00

Started a new job on Monday. Boy, do I like it!!! No Bull sh*t. thank goodness and everyone there is very nice. At least they are right now. I probably should... as they say, 'wait until the honeymoon is over'! Already got paid my first week though! SO I like it....

summer heat

2005-07-22T22:42:00.000-07:00

Yesterday was a weird day. Full moon and boy could I tell. It was swelting hot, humid, muggy, sunny, rainy everything. I love summer but I can't wait until the fall. Though it's not the same down here (Florida) as it was back home (Boston). I miss the color of the leaves in the fall, but I can always turn on my TV and there it is. Autumn in Florida is awesome. Even though it's the most active part of the hurricane season, the weather is so beautiful. We go swimming up to Thanksgiving...sometimes even Christmas. I love it here, and yes, even in the hot, humid, muggy, sunny, rainy summer....cause I have central air.............